Tuesday, September 20, 2022

Slow to Anger – Mixed Emotions

September 20, 2022/in Bible Study, Week 2

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I am consumed with anger more often than I like to admit. Sometimes, I stop, breathe, count to four, and … nope, I still feel like the Hulk and want to smash everything in sight.

Maybe that argument I was in last week is spilling over and something that was said or done is still eating at me. Was it truly addressed? Why is it still bugging me?

It is because I didn’t take it to God. I didn’t ask the Father for help to sort through the issues. Chances are high that it was my pride holding me back.

In the first week of our series, we were told to name the problem so we can get curious about it. I think the same rings true with anger. If we can name the anger—what caused it—it’s a step toward working through it.

I have found that if I stop, think, and pray for guidance to figure out why I’m angry, I can turn all the energy I am wasting on being mad toward getting curious. I’m able to look for the true source of my anger and reign in my overloaded amygdala that wants to rule my emotions and actions.

When I go to God with my problems, I slow down. When I talk to him, it helps me replay what happened—sort of like a journal.

James 1:19-20

19 Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry. 20 Human anger does not produce the righteousness God desires.

How can we live this out to work through our arguments and difficult situations?

First, take a deep breath and acknowledge your anger.

Were you quick to listen? Did the person really say what you heard in that argument?

Were you slow to speak? Or were you quick to say something that you probably shouldn’t have?

Were you slow to get angry? Or did you let your emotions get the best of you? This is where I struggle the most, but as I learn to search for the source of my anger, it’s becoming easier to determine if it’s even worth the time to be dwelling on it.

Matthew 15:11

“It’s not what goes into your mouth that defiles you; you are defiled by the words that come out of your mouth.”

Anger is an emotion that God knows about because he gave it to us. Once we’ve rationalized why we’re angry in the first place, we don’t have to stay angry. If you’ve been around CedarCreek for a while, you’ve probably heard: It’s ok to not be ok, but you don’t have to stay that way. Now, think about this in terms of anger:

It’s ok to be angry, but I don’t have to stay that way.

The next time you’re stewing over something, take a deep breath, acknowledge your anger, pray for guidance, and consider saying that out loud—it may be the “count to four” you need to prevent the Hulk from coming out.

Questions:

How do you slow yourself down when you feel your anger getting out of control? Do you talk it out with a friend, family member, or even a counselor?

Next Steps:

Breathe, count to four, pray for an answer to what made you angry. Seek help from a professional if need be—there is no shame in asking for help.

Prayer:

God, when I get angry, help me get back to the peaceful person you and I know I am. Help me guide others in finding ways to deal with their anger or misplaced emotions that lead to anger. Allow me to see whether or not the anger I feel at times is for the right reasons so that I can be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger. In Jesus’ name I pray, amen.