Friday, September 30, 2022

Learn Through Your Regrets – Mixed Emotions

September 30, 2022/in Bible Study, Week 3

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As a perfectionist, I’d say disappointment and regret come as naturally to me as breathing. I’ll bet some of you can relate. There’s always something that could’ve been or made it better.

Some disappointments are little—forgetting something at home, spilling coffee on my shirt—nuisances I’ll forget in a day or two. Others are bigger regrets that may stay with me the rest of my life.

Over the last few days, we’ve talked about different ways to learn through our disappointments. Once we’ve avoided the “-er”s and acknowledged our own part in what happened, it’s time to do something to move forward. Taking a step to try something new or fun is a great place to start.

In my experience, trying something fun helps in two ways.

First: When done in a healthy way, it can be a good distraction—a way to remind us that no matter what’s behind us, God still has a rich, satisfying life ahead of us.

I don’t think it’s healthy to ignore your emotions or mistakes, but once you’ve processed them and figured out what you can learn from them, eventually you have to move forward. You have to let go and step into what’s ahead. This isn’t necessarily a one-and-done decision—I often catch myself looking back at past regrets and disappointments, still hurting over what’s been done to me and blaming myself for things I wish I’d done differently. But I’ve learned as many lessons as I can from what happened, and God’s plan for me does not exist in the past. It’s time to live, enjoy the present, and look to the future.

Second: Trying something new and fun can help me apply what I’ve learned, by finding a better way. Sometimes we experience regret because we’re trying to live in a way we weren’t intended to—in a way that doesn’t align with who God designed us to be or how he calls us to live. But when we try something fun that combines what brings us joy and the way we’re wired in a way that helps us connect with others, we find ourselves living in God’s purpose for us. And when we live in God’s purpose, we don’t stop experiencing disappointment and regret, but trust me when I say, we experience those things less.

John 10:10

The thief’s purpose is to steal and kill and destroy. My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life.

At the end of the day, one of the ways God has helped me move past disappointments and regrets is through the gift of the amazing, life-giving friends I’ve journeyed with. They help me to avoid getting caught up in what could’ve been better; to see the truth of what happened so that I can acknowledge my own part in it, while affirming that no matter what, I matter; and they remind me to enjoy life, move forward, and look to the future.

To the authentic, life-giving people in my life who’ve helped me move past my disappointments and regrets: Thank you. I don’t know where I’d be without you.

Proverbs 27:17

As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend.

Questions:

Do you feel ready to let go of and move past your regrets?

What’s something new and fun you can try this week—that combines the way you’re wired with what brings you joy and helps you connect with others?

Who in your life helps you learn through your regrets? Who can you help learn through their regrets?

Next Steps:

If you haven’t joined a Group yet, now is the time. We are not meant to do life alone. Go to CedarCreek.tv/groups to find the right fit for you.

Try something new and fun today, this weekend, or this coming week!

Prayer:

Heavenly Father, you know the disappointments and regrets we each carry. Thank you for always giving us a way to learn through these emotions and eventually move forward. Help us to forgive those who have disappointed us, and to forgive ourselves for the things we regret. Teach us to move forward, stepping into the rich, satisfying life you intended for us, and into authentic, life-giving relationships with those around us. In Jesus’ name I pray, amen.