Thursday, September 11, 2025

Download the PDF. 

When you need to confront an issue: 

THE SET UP

Prepare your points for the conversation.

● Pray for wisdom and clarity.

● Ask: What’s the real issue or pattern? Keep it focused.

● Useful: Filter out blame, labels, or extra drama.

● Solutions: Think of 2–3 constructive options.

Then request to set a time to meet.

THE “SIT DOWN”

Present your case with calm and grace.

● Problem/Pattern: Describe what you see.

● Personal Impact: Share how it has impacted you.

● Personal Desire: What do you want to experience more?

● Propose Solutions: Offer your ideas, invite theirs.

 End with gratitude for their willingness to listen.

THE SOLUTION(s)

● Allow time for them to consider the next step that would lead toward restoration.

● Accept solutions that you believe will help resolve the issue and restore the relationship.

● If you get stuck discuss next steps which could include getting a third party involved.

PRAY

Pray with each other and for your future.

● Avoid “preachy prayers.”

● Focus your prayer on your part of the agreement.

When you are being confronted:

THE SET UP

 Prepare your heart to listen.

● When someone says, “I’d like to set an appointment,” pause.

● Find a time when you can be physically, emotionally, and spiritually ready to listen.

● Prepare your heart: “Put on Teflon”—don’t let offense or defensiveness stick.

Propose when you will be prepared to listen.

THE “SIT DOWN”

Pay attention to what they are saying.

● Hear them out without interrupting.

● Reflect back what you heard to confirm understanding.

● Stay curious, not combative.

● Avoid deflecting (no “counter-appointments”).

Ensure that they feel heard and that you understand the proposed solutions.

THE SOLUTION(s)

● Consider the solution (or propose a solution) that you sense will help resolve the issue and restore the relationship.

● Options: acknowledge, apologize, or agree to a solution.

● If you need time, say so—but follow up promptly.

PRAY

Pray with each other and for your future.

● Avoid “preachy prayers.”

● Focus your prayer on your part of the agreement.